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Friend.Chocoholic.Tantrum-thrower.Child.Woman.Whatever !!!!!!!!

I am petty. So what?

with 14 comments

My mom’s always told me ‘Chaadar dekh ke pair pasarna”  which basically meant “Check your wallet before you spend”.

That’s one lesson I learnt well in my first few months when I moved out of home and actually handled money for the first time. I’d get x amount a month and I’d divide it in 4 to be used for the  4 weeks accordingly. After the first fiasco (where my mom bailed me out and then cut the same amount from the coming month’s money), I only had to ask for extra money once in 3rd year and then for my last couple of months in Pune. If I ever made the mistake of calling home and wailing I’m broke, I’d only get a huge lecture for the next few days so I never did that. My emergency money stash was kept with one of my close friends and vice versa so that we didn’t spend it.

I still follow that philosophy today. I know the chunk of my expenses and only after I have allocated for those, do I look at my frivolous kharchas.

Unfortunately, I fail to understand why most people don’t do that. Quite a few times have the office boys/ peons come wailing saying “kid’s school fees” or “shaadi kharcha”. Dude, if you can’t afford your kid’s school fees then find a cheaper school or budget your marriage accordingly. Just because I’m in a higher salary bracket and have no kids does not mean that I be made to take on your expenses. A sudden emergency is a different issue but why should I be made to feel guilty that someone’s kid doesn’t have shoes. If you know that you make x and have to run your entire household on that amount, then budget accordingly. Don’t come crying to me. And if you can’t afford to maintain 2 kids why have a 3rd kid and then expect the office to pitch in. It simply pisses me off. When one of the clerk/ peons get married, apart from the cash gift from office (which is not a small sum), we also give a good sum of money as cash. Why should I be asked to pay for something over and above that? If you can’t pay for your own marriage, then take out a loan or budget accordingly. That’s really not my business or my headache.

And when a few of us do say this in office, then we are taken to be petty or hard – hearted. I don’t get that. I don’t come crying to office and ask everyone to pay off my credit card bills or my house rent? In essence, if your coming to me for your  kid’s fees it is the same thing. Why don’t people understand that if I earn a certain sum, my expenses are also proportionate. Looking after your expenses is your responsibility – whether you earn 2000/- or 20,000/- or 2,00,000/-. And if I say I’l help budget their expenses, they tell me its not my business. Sorry but if your coming to me every month and think it ios your birthright to demand a handout, it is my business.

This is after all my hard earned money too and I have a say over how I spend it. Whether I choose to spend it on a watch for myself or help someone someone is my call. If it is deemed petty so be it.

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Written by SupMM

March 4, 2010 at 6:23 pm

Posted in Uncategorized

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14 Responses

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  1. i guess this has happened too many times for you to keep quiet huh 🙂

    Aditya

    March 4, 2010 at 6:30 pm

    • Your guessed right 😛

      supmm

      March 4, 2010 at 6:41 pm

  2. so true!!i am aware of ppl who do that way too often and thats really annoying!

    Ria

    March 4, 2010 at 11:23 pm

    • I am so happy there are others also feel like me. I get sooo pissed off with such ppl

      supmm

      March 5, 2010 at 2:25 pm

  3. On reading this, I must say that my present maid is the first maid I have come across who has not asked me for any extra money… not even on festivals.! She lets me know if she needs an advance on the month for any festival and at the end of the month I just pay her the balance. And, I have had horrible experiences where maids have asked me for 10k advance!!!

    Aathira

    March 5, 2010 at 12:10 am

    • A 10k advance? For what?

      Touchwood neither does my maid make such demands. Only once did she ask and that too for her daughter’s wedding for which I didn’t mind. If needed she takes a loan from me and we adjust it against her salary for the next few months

      supmm

      March 5, 2010 at 2:27 pm

  4. You certainly are hard-hearted, Supps. Telling people not to have the 3rd kid! Didn’t you know, this is our philosophy? Produce anything else worthwhile or not… ensure there’s a baby always crying in the background!! He he!

    I agree with you, people make others feel guilty because they earn or have more. They don’t realise that while not everything is in one’s control, some of it atleast is. And if one cannot afford money for a private school, then atleast a good public school, and take the trouble to tutor kids additionally at home, instead of boozing the money away (for example).

    Pal

    March 5, 2010 at 1:14 am

    • Pal, I’m not telling them don’t have the 3rd kid. I’m just saying don’t ask me to pay for him 😛

      And if you tell them that you’l help them work out the budget or give a shirt term loan they take offense. If one would rather spend his money on booze and then ask me to take care of your house, he can jolly well go take a hike.

      supmm

      March 5, 2010 at 2:29 pm

  5. I totally agree. It is my money. I will help the needy but not if people choose to be needy all their lives and live off my salary!

    Meira

    March 5, 2010 at 12:27 pm

    • I couldn’t have put it better Meira 🙂

      supmm

      March 5, 2010 at 2:30 pm

  6. People really do that?! That’s just SO wrong! I can’t fathom this, how can anyone approach an acquaintance and ask for financial help and that too on a regular basis?!

    DewdropDream

    March 5, 2010 at 5:44 pm

    • I can’t imagine it either…but people do it. And if you help them once they take it for granted and expect it every time they approach you therafter

      supmm

      March 9, 2010 at 10:13 am

  7. I am with you on this one. I especially got pissed off when girls used to borrow from me ,not for emergencies,but for luxuries-atleast what was a luxury when we were studying.

    lostonthestreet

    March 6, 2010 at 6:14 pm

    • Me too…or when girls would spend thousand on their make-up stuff and then come borrowing ten bucks from me to buy milk

      supmm

      March 9, 2010 at 10:11 am


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